Beyond the Lights

I've been wanting to see the movie Beyond the Lights since it was in theaters, it seemed like a really cool movie.  Finally I sat down and watched the movie after I saw that it had hit Netflix a while ago, and I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, and not necessarily for the movie itself but for the underlying message, depression and suicide.  Depression is a major illness that affects so many individuals, sometimes they are aware they are suffering from the illness and sometimes they don't until it's too late.  Suicide seems to be growing at a rapid rate, so many people not aware of the fact that they are suffering from depression turn to suicide to stop all the pain they may be feeling in their lives.  In the African American community, the take on mental illness is the worst.  The show Empire touched on the seriousness of mental illness last season and how in the African American community we feel that mental illness is not something that affects us, that it is a "Caucasian disease." But just like so many other things in life, mental illness has no ethnicity, no color, and it's time to spread awareness of mental illness and how it effects all ethnicity.

Is Romance Dead?

Lately I have been seeing a lot of post on various social media sites about the struggles of dating, how some people's view points on what on considers a good date or not a good date is acceptable or unacceptable, which led to my question of "Is Romance Dead?"
My guy friend and I were having a discussion about what would be considered an appropriate date, and me being the extra creative person that I am, I felt that a movie date just wouldn't cut it. Movie dates in my mind are something you do once you're comfortable, there's no thought process behind it, there's nothing special in saying "Hey, tonight we're going to the movies."

What is Love?

Webster defines love as an intense feeling of deep affection, a person or thing that one loves, and to feel a deep romantic or sexual attachment to (someone).  The Bible in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 states it like this "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

Do You Still Believe in Love?

Do you still believe in love?

I have never been the lovey dovey type, the girl that has had her wedding planned since the age of 3.  Okay the age of 3 may be a little dramatic, but working in the wedding industry there are seriously some ladies that have been planning their "dream wedding" since they could utter the words I Love You!  But hey, that's not me.  I've had my fair share of heartbreak, and it seems like more heartbreak than love, but the only thing that keeps me from saying that I have given up on love is because the Bible states that God is love, and I will never give up on God because He would never give up on me.  But to say that I had given up on the fairy tale ending is how I would put my take on love.  My mother was always my life line, that one love that made the blow from another heartbreak seem less fatal.  They say you can die from a broken heart, I just hope and pray that my demise is not due to a broken heart.  But you know what's amazing, how you can have such negative experiences with relationships and love and yet still have hope in love.  What's truly amazing is how an individual can come into your life unexpectedly and change your outlook on life.

Life's Angels: Sally

Today I met the grandmother of one of my customers and boy was she funny.  She stated that her granddaughter was upset with her because she didn't go with her to try on wedding dresses on Sunday because she was busy watching the Falcons game. (Yes she chose the Falcons game over her grandmother trying on wedding gowns lol).  She was a very outspoken individual and she talked about how she was depressed because she thought the Falcons were going to lose and how sad she is that this is Tony Gonzalez last year.

Well after going on and on about the Falcons she went on to say that her granddaughter is always telling her that she talks too much and embarrasses her.  But having a near death experience two months ago she said that it put a perspective on her life, that life is entirely too short to worry about everybody thinks about you or to worry about the little things in life.

Good Bye 2012, Hello 2013

2012 was definitely a year filled with ups and downs and though it seems like I had more downs than ups, the magnitude of the ups definitely outweighs the pits of my downs.  This year marked the five year anniversary of the passing of my mother, and we all know that I'm not a very emotional person but boy did this effect me.

This year marked some major points in my life.  I realized that in more ways than one I was living my life for others and not the two most important people, God and myself.  I found myself this year and I came to the realization of the path I want to take in my life (and no it has absolutely nothing to do with science LOL).  I guess I can throw that BS in Biology out of the window *sigh*.

'Til Death Do Us Part

Recently on Facebook I asked are the vows of marriage a joke these days and it shocked me at the number of people that liked my status.  For some reason I felt that I was the only person that had that feeling about the vows of marriage but it seems that there are others that are thinking the same thing as I am.

Let's Wait Awhile

With the recent release of the Steve Harvey movie Think Like a Man a lot of people have been debating some of the topics that are brought up in his move based off relationship book Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.  With that I posted my recent debate of the day to twitter, facebook and instagram to get some feed back and what people thought of one of Harvey's dating reals for women.  The 90 day rule. This rule basically states that a female should wait at least 90 days before giving up the "cookies" to the man in which she is dating.  Which led to my question "How long should two people date before having sex?"

When I posted this question I was thinking that I would get the usual 90 days, especially from females and the whole Steve Harvey book, but I ended up getting a wide range of answers that I was not expecting.  The answers ranged from a month to a year to wait until you all are married.

The waiting until marriage was not a shocker to me because a lot of females have the mindset and thought of waiting until marriage before having sex.  And honestly if that guy is the guy for you then he should not have a problem waiting until you all are married to have sex. In my mind that means he is truly thinking of a future with you and not thinking of lets see where this leads us.  He really feels that he can see himself with you for the rest of his life.  Ladies if you say I want to wait until marriage to have sex and he says that is fine with me we can wait, then he is a keeper and he respects you, is feeling you, and loves you enough to wait without attempting to pressure you into engaging in sexual intercourse.

Now on to my shocking answers, I received answers such as 6 months, a month, a year.  I had individuals that broke it down like it was a timeline.  One person stated that the first 3 months were to get to know each other and the next three months were to get to meet his friends and family, then once you've met the family you can then begin to have sexual intercourse.  In my opinion the timeline makes things difficult, relationships are not a timeline, not a schedule, you have to let things flow naturally.  What if he takes you to meet his family before your initial three months are up, then your timeline of six months is thrown out the window.  A gentleman involved in the debate said he waited for one year before having sexual intercourse with his mate but that relationship did not last as long as the relationship he had with a mate he had sexual intercourse with on the first night.  Which leads me to wonder to males base their means of having sex based off of what the female wants? But then again a lot of males state that they can tell what they can get out of a female and what they want from a female based off of the vibe of the female.

Although I had a wide range of answers, the most consistent answer I got besides the 90 day rule is that you can't put a time frame on that question because no two relationships are the same.  A lot stated it that it all depends on how well you know the person before you all started dating.  Like if you all were friends prior to deciding to try dating each other do you still wait that 90 days that is supposed to be used to get to know one another, do you jump right in, or do you wait until you all decide on where the new adventure you all are partaking in is worth the risk .  All depends on that relationship, that friendship, that bond you have with someone.  Some people bond faster than others, some take that 3 to 6 to 12 months to bond.

But whatever you do, don't rush into things it will only make things more difficult and sometimes will confuse your heart.  Make a decision and stick with it.  Be comfortable and secure in your skin and in the relationship before jumping in the bed with your partner.  So many females get caught up in thinking that the only way to get a guy, to keep a guy, to get a guy to decide to make you his girlfriend is to give up the "cookies".  Respect yourselves ladies and gents do not jump in to something you are not ready for especially sex with another individual, you will know when the time is right to engage in sexual intercourse with a person and it will be well worth the wait whether its a month, 3 months, 6 months, 12 months, or the night you get married.  Just know that all relationships are not the same, should not be treated the same, don't base your time frame for giving up the "cookies" based on something someone else said you should do, let things flow naturally.

Life's Angels: Janet

Every now and then we meet individuals that will bring tears to your eyes and make you feel horrible for all the complaining you've done in life.

Meet Ms. Janet... 

Ms. Janet is a cancer survivor who will tell you right off bat by the grace of God I'm standing here today.  Off of first impressions if you can tell that something is wrong with Ms. Janet, her speech is very slow, she sometimes get hung up on words, and gets irritated really easily which sometimes leads to crying.  It's not until you talk to Janet and get to know her that you find out her life story.

Ms. Janet found out two years ago that she has a brain tumor.  After surgery, extensive chemotherapy and radiation Ms. Janet can now stand here and say that she his cancer free and so happy to be alive.  She will tell you that she should not be standing here today and that she is so happy that she is still alive.  Ms. Janet has recently had the ability to see her first grandchild born and will soon witness her son walk the aisle, two things she says that she would not have been able to witness without God's mercy.

Meeting Ms. Janet was truly very touching and humbling and it has taught me to never take life for grant, have faith in God and he will get you through every obstacle.  Be thankful for life for you never know what day will be your last or if you will make it to see such wonderful joys in this world.  Never take anything for granted.

Meet & Greet: Yandy

This past Friday I had the opportunity to meet Love & Hip Hop's Yandy while she was in Macon hosting a party at Club Asylum brought you by Macon's own Nxt Lvl Ent and Team BBC.  She was a really cool and laid back individual and make sure you stay tuned for an exclusive interview by Royce of RoycEvents & Sound.

How deep is your friendship?

A couple of weeks ago I conducted a Debate of the Day in which the question was "Would you risk your friendship to tell your friend you were attracted to them?"

Life's Angels: Roxie

Yesterday I met an older lady that really touched my heart, so in meeting her I decided I would a segment for Life: The Rollercoaster entitled Life's Angels for those individuals that meet along this rollercoaster of life that touch my heart in one or another.


Meet Ms. Roxie...

Just Friends or More Than Friends

Today a struck up an interesting debate on twitter, topic being "Is It Possible For Males and Females to be just friends?"  The response I got was split with some saying yeah they can butttttt there's some stipulations to the friendship.